Lazy Pages

When do parasocial relationships become dangerous? If you don’t live on the internet like me, the term ‘parasocial relationship’ might be unfamiliar. Essentially, as Vinney explained in 2022, it refers to the one-sided connection that a media consumer forms with a media persona, be it a celebrity, a social media influencer, or even a fictional character. Vinney also noted that while research often focuses on the friendship-like bonds in these relationships, they can also take negative or even romantic forms. Drawing from Giles and Maltby’s classifications in 2006, which distinguish between entertainment-social, intense-personal, and borderline-pathological parasocial relationships, we’ll explore how these dynamics intersect with our discussions on public spheres and fan studies. Through the lens of Taylor Swift’s fandom, we’ll look into these three types of parasocial relationships, examining when they can become dangerous and how to navigate them. By doing so, we’ll deepen our understanding of parasocial relationships and their real-world implications. It’s worth noting that the concepts of fandom and parasocial relationships often intertwine, sharing many common characteristics.

How does one become part of a fandom? Typically, it’s a natural process. Perhaps you hear a song by an artist on the radio and enjoy it, or you relate to a character in a book. Maybe a friend or family member introduces you to a social media influencer you end up liking. These initial, casual interactions with a media persona are what Giles and Maltby refer to as ‘entertainment-social relationships’ in the parasocial world. In this category, you recognize that you don’t actually know the person, but you find enjoyment in talking about them and following their content. Being a fan can enhance real-life connections and involvement in public discussions about the figure. For instance, being a casual fan of Taylor Swift might mean enjoying her music, attending concerts, and appreciating the hype around her, without forming a deep emotional attachment. While this level of involvement isn’t inherently dangerous, it may limit the depth of your social connections within the fan community. However, it often serves as a starting point for deeper engagement with the fandom over time.

Conversely, there are intense-personal parasocial relationships. This is where you would begin to worship your media figure as a role model, and their words and actions are replicated by their fandom as they are disseminated through public spheres. In this subcategory, your feelings toward the chosen media figure can become intense and compulsive. While you may acknowledge the relationship is not real, you may find yourself unable to fully control your emotions toward the person or character. For instance, individuals in intense-personal parasocial relationships might feel compelled to defend their media figure’s actions online or feel distressed when others don’t share their enthusiasm. From a Swiftie perspective, this level of relationship might manifest in ‘gatekeeping’ Taylor Swift from potential fans or looking down on those with differing levels of involvement in the fandom or public sphere. A real-world example I’ve witnessed is when these fans begin to harass and threaten more casual fans when they purchase tickets to Swift’s concert, deeming them not worthy to attend. Intense-personal relationships can also be positive when fans advocate for positive messages associated with the figure, such as Taylor Swift’s charitable actions and advocacy for social justice. However, the danger lies in the potential negative consequences. While Hoffner and Bond noted in 2022 that these relationships can foster social connections and promote healthy attitudes, they can also lead to negative self-comparisons and adverse mental health effects.  McQuail and others argued in ‘The Television Audience: A Revised Perspective’ that the desire for parasocial relationships may result in deficiencies in real-world social interactions. Some things to consider if you find yourself in this position may be: Is it becoming too important to your identity to be a fan of this person? And as Giles and Maltby mention, What if the focus of your parasocial relationship does something morally bad and it becomes embarrassing to be associated with them? 

If you feel as though you’re involved in this type of relationship, it may be beneficial to do some reflection and find out if you’re depending on it too much compared to your reciprocated relationships.

The last category of parasocial relationships, known as the borderline-pathological, is the least common yet most dangerous type. 

In these instances, individuals lose control over their thoughts, emotions, and sometimes actions toward their chosen media figure. This can escalate to stalking or even violence. Often, such behavior stems from involvement in dangerous or misguided public spheres, or from misinterpreting real interactions with a media figure. For instance, consider the case of Taylor Swift and her stalker, Roger Alvarado. Described by Beaumont-Thomas in a 2024 article, Alvarado attempted to break into Swift’s New York home in 2018 using a shovel. Despite being jailed for nine months, he broke in again after his release and is currently serving a two-to-four-year prison sentence. This behavior not only poses a physical danger to the celebrity but also demonstrates a lack of control that can lead fans to harm themselves. Swift herself expressed ongoing fear for her safety in 2019, citing numerous stalking incidents throughout her career. Despite the danger, such individuals must receive support and intervention rather than becoming demonized. As Hill suggests in ‘Characteristics Of The Stalker,’ many perpetrators of celebrity stalking suffer from mental health or personality disorders, motivating their problematic behavior. She notes that in many cases, stalkers experience erotomanic delusions, genuinely believing their idol is in love with them. 

In conclusion, by looking at parasocial relationships through the lens of fan studies and public spheres, we can recognise that there is a fine line between admiration and obsession. When individuals form an emotional bond with a media persona, whether a celebrity or fictional character, the relationship can be categorised into varying degrees of productivity. On one hand, these relationships can enrich lives, fostering a sense of community and allowing for greater self-expression within fandoms and public spheres. However, on the other hand, when these relationships evolve into intense-personal or borderline-pathological territories, they can have a detrimental effect on mental health and interpersonal dynamics. As Giles and Maltby illustrate, the tipping point into danger often lies in the loss of perspective and control. When admiration changes into compulsion, and when boundaries between fiction and reality blur, fans risk harming themselves and others. The many cases of Taylor Swift and her stalkers serve as a stark reminder of the real-world consequences of borderline-pathological relationships. Overall this highlights how important it is to be mindful of how much we depend on parasocial relationships to inform our ideologies and foster social connection. In summary, parasocial relationships become dangerous when we fail to pause and assess their impact on our lives. It is imperative to make sure we don’t allow a single media persona to monopolize our social connections, and ensure a healthier balance in our engagement with media figures just like Taylor Swift.

References:

Beaumont-Thomas, B 2024, ‘Taylor Swift: Man Charged with Harassment and Stalking outside Singer’s Home’, The Guardian, 23 January.

Cleveland Clinic 2023, Friend or Faux: Are Parasocial Relationships Healthy?, Cleveland Clinic.

Giles, DC & Maltby, J 2006, ‘Praying at the Altar of the Stars’, The Psychologist, vol. 19, no. 2.

Hill, T 2014, Characteristics Of The Stalker: Know What To Look For, Psych Central.

McQuail, D, Blumler, JG & Brown, JR 1972, ‘The Television Audience: A Revised Perspective’, Sociology of Mass Communications, vol. 1, no. 1.

Vinney, C 2022, What Is a Parasocial Relationship?, Verywell Mind, Dotdash.